This wording is so exagerrated it's almost bare-faced lying. "Non-anorexic" might technically be true, but a more accurate way of putting it is she's obese. Possibly morbidly obese. And "being" 64 isn't keeping her out of this role. Looking 81 is.
Jennifer Connelly is age-appropriate for Tom and looks as good as he does. That's what Hollywood wants. You can argue that's wrong but you have to start from a baseline of reality, not some over the top spin on the narrative.
As for the gay bit, I dunno man. Seems to be plenty of explanation in the fact that she looks like she could be playing Tom Cruise's overweight mother rather than his love interest. I don't think we need to fabricate some homophobia based on nothing to make sense of this story.